Could My 2 Year Old Be Scared Of The Dark Eating Disorders – Coaching Yourself To Recovery

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Eating Disorders – Coaching Yourself To Recovery

Eating disorders, food obsession and perfectionism don’t always end with a nutritional grade or 100% raw vegan diet. Yes, eliminating toxins and processed foods helps – sometimes terribly – but the pressure to look healthy, thin and beautiful can continue beyond education or dietary changes. Often, it actually increases.

As a Medical Intuitive and Life Coach, I have met many nutritionists and raw eaters who are ashamed and embarrassed of their ongoing problems with food. As health advocates, they “don’t have these problems anymore!” “Why can’t they practice what they preach?” “Why the self-sabotage?”

Secret cooked foods, bulimia (overeating followed by regurgitation or excessive exercise), dangerously long fasts and detoxification attempts, uncontrollable cravings. This dark side of radiant health can plunge people into a sea of ​​shame and depression—which, of course, they’re not supposed to feel either. “What if my customers or readers find out?” they worry.

“You’re human,” I say. “And it’s more common than you think.” So common and underreported, in fact, that I decided to write an article.

Fortunately, our bodies never betray us. They work on behalf of our souls-trying to get our attention when nothing else has. As with any health concern, once we decode and accept the message, we can let go of the symptoms.

Most psychologists recognize the tendency of these patients towards perfectionism. Therapy tries to deny self-judgment. This helps to some extent, but most “recovered” anorexics or bulimics privately admit that the disorder returns whenever they feel out of control. Best case scenario, they can manage the stress and not revert to old behavior patterns – but the thoughts remain.

Telling someone to “drop the perfectionism” does not provide a cure. In fact, it prevents the cure! Because, truth be told, these people know they can do better. They know they can live bigger, brighter, more impactful lives-perhaps more than anyone around them imagines. The pursuit of a perfect body or perfect health reflects a deeper drive to perfect the Self. Successful treatment of eating disorders must honor this inner drive—and create a safe space to explore unusual gifts and talents.

In a society that feels more comfortable with mediocrity, it often seems easier to transfer the mission of the soul to the body. Thus, the anorexic who holds within her a fully compassionate, radiant, healing presence feels less conspicuous as a walking skeleton. The bulimic, whose potentially best-selling words of wisdom could transform millions of lives, finds it easier to throw food than write her book. The personal trainer, who intuitively knows how to heal his clients’ self-esteem, puts all his energy into pumping iron so that people notice his body rather than his soul. The overweight psychic piles on pounds to drown out her too bright inner glow.

I have noticed a complex but consistent dynamic in people with eating disorders. Yes, they exhibit perfectionist tendencies, but not in the way most people assume. The shame of imperfection stems less from a damaged body image than from living below their natural abilities. At some level, these people recognize that they have gifts to share, but they are afraid. Perhaps the world will not accept their unusual talents. Maybe family tells them they have to live a certain way. Maybe some people find his message offensive. And if everyone thinks they’ve lost their minds?

Whatever the rationale for avoiding their gifts, these perfectionists know intuitively that they are not sharing what they could. The shame they express about their bodies or eating habits really reflects a deeper shame for not living as authentically and compassionately as they could. It doesn’t matter if people tell them they look good or consider them experts in their field. It doesn’t even matter if they are experts in their field! These people know they could do more, and they are ashamed of slacking off.

Ultimately, it’s not really about perfection, though. It’s about the “r” word. Liability. Having that kind of influence that changes lives can feel scary. Self-sabotage provides both a distraction and “proof of unworthiness” to use such influence. But physical/psychological symptoms can only distract for so long. Finally, they demand attention, forcing people to address these latent gifts. The good news is that people recover from eating disorders, and you can too, by augmenting your traditional treatments with targeted personal growth exercises:

1) Practice mindful eating. Pay attention to your food. Notice the tastes, colors, textures and how these make you feel. Consider all the people and processes involved in the growth and production of your food and express gratitude for the gift on your plate.

2) Start a meditation practice. You can buy a CD such as Yogiraj Alan Finger’s Life Enhancing Meditations or Deepak Chopra’s SoulofHealing Meditation CD. Both offer great guidance for forgiving yourself and others, allowing you to open up to a bigger, more influential you.

You can also try a kundalini yoga meditation called Sa Ta Na Ma. The words “sa ta na ma” roughly translate to birth, life, death, rebirth, and are such a powerful transformational mantra. When you sing Sa Ta Na Ma, sit on the floor with your legs crossed and press your elbows into your ribs so that your arms each form 90-degree angles at your sides. Press the fingertips to the pads on your palms and lift your thumb up like a hitchhiker. Inhale deeply and then exhale all your air, sucking your navel to your back. Keeping the belly empty, chant four rounds of “Sa Ta Na Ma” silently to yourself. Take a deep breath and repeat this process at least six times, up to eleven minutes. The combination of completely emptying and then filling the lungs and belly, combined with the meaning, makes this an excellent technique for people with eating disorders.

3) Whenever you feel “too big” physically, explore your spiritual gifts. If you don’t consciously know what these are, ask for guidance. They will reveal themselves! You can also take a 60-question inventory here: http://www.elca.org/evangelism/assessments/spiritgifts.html. (If you are not Christian, modify the questions for your personal belief system.) People often feel “huge” not because of actual surroundings but because they have so much unused “stuff” inside them.

4) When you feel the urge to purge, release in another way. Honor pent up energy, words and talents that seek expression. Write, paint, draw, volunteer. Share something beautiful!

5) When you want to starve yourself, “feed” the world. Look at the people around you who are hungry for emotional or spiritual nourishment. Offer random acts of kindness as support. Clean house and donate old clothes. Give until you feel balanced to receive again.

6) If you are ashamed of your “problems”, remember where you are going. Shame will dissolve as you embrace your deeper purpose and share that beauty with the world. We are changing the world and our lives one step at a time. Each day, focus on one small step—a journal entry, a conversation, or an app test. A collection of older clothes put together in unexpected ways. A walk in nature. Letter to the editor.

7) If your stomach is bothering you, focus on your heart center. If you’re having trouble getting into your heart, imagine a green, gold, or pink light moving in and out of you with your breath. Follow your breath and feel a pulsating warmth in the center of your chest. Let that warmth envelop you and radiate from you like warm, honey, emanating sweetness. Your heart is only one step above your belly, but that one step lifts you out of ego and into communion.

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