Fun Places To Take A 2 Year Old In Orlando 5 Reasons People Have Affairs: Did I Deserve To Be Cheated On?

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5 Reasons People Have Affairs: Did I Deserve To Be Cheated On?

Why do people have affairs?

You may not have been perfect, but you don’t think you deserved to be cheated on. There were times in the marriage that you wanted to give up too. Marriage is not always a bed of roses and it is certainly nothing like the movies after the first few years. So you naturally ask yourself.

Why did my wife cheat on me? Did I deserve it?

This is complicated. I personally don’t believe that anyone cheats for just one reason, but in general, there seems to be some foundation of reasoning why a wayward spouse decides to walk away from their husband or wife, core reasons for cheating, if you will.

I also believe that most husbands never intend to hurt their spouse, even when things are rotten in the relationship. Not many actually plan to have affairs and everyone hits rough patches during marriage, but cheating is a choice and it is a result of mismanaging their emotions.

Please note that these are my personal observations of why people have affairs, many professional marriage counselors or psychologists have created their own lists from hundreds or even thousands of counseling sessions. Besides, these reasons are for rational people, not sociopaths who enter marriage with bad intentions from the start.

5 Reasons People Cheat On Their Spouses

1. “I can’t handle marriage.”

Basically what they are saying here is I want my freedom. I don’t like to deal with their spouse’s responsibility to do the things they don’t want to do, like clean, save money, pay bills, go to church, etc. The bottom line is that they have a hard time sharing. Some new person comes along and provides them with that escape from reality where the focus is on fun and romance not surviving and coexisting.

2. “I’m tired of fighting.”

This one hits home with me personally. You try to be loyal, but after a while you can’t handle your wife’s constant arguments and complaints. You start to wonder what it would be like to be with someone who just accepts you as you are.

BEWARE: this is still an excuse to cheat, the complaining happened for a reason and the cheating spouse has not developed any coping strategies to deal with the more honest spouse.

3. “I haven’t had enough connections.”

Or as I like to think of it, “I didn’t get it all out of my system.” The “it” is experienced by many different people. Some experts say that the feeling of the need to experience more relationships begins during adolescence. They needed more attention or love, affirmation that they were attractive and wanted. BEWARE: I believe almost every cheater suffers from this reasoning. Many people, both men and women, crave attention and sex.

4. “I’m tired of being a victim.”

Maybe they caught their spouse cheating on them or suspected infidelity, either way they got tired of inappropriate behavior. Deep down they just want to have a normal marriage and be treated fairly, but their inability to stop the inappropriate behavior has pushed them to the boiling point of no return and they don’t know what else to do. In their minds cheating will get their attention. BEWARE: I have a little difficulty in believing that everyone who is a victim of this reason is doing it just to get revenge or to get attention from their spouse. They may lack love and attention.

5. “I want to feel like I still got it.”

Most people want to feel sexy, attractive and hope that others pursue them. Perhaps this is also a sense of security that they will never be alone because they would always have a potential suitor who is looking for them. This stems from a personal need that if not managed and addressed early the marriage could spin out of control later. BEWARE: my belief is that someone who craves attention from the opposite sex so much probably really cares about their spouse, but regularly cheats. It is warm and invigorating to meet someone new again and again. The marriage is a safe haven for them. They enjoy living two lives.

Again there are many reasons why people have affairs and I personally believe that most cheaters experience a combination of the above list. Every person who walks away from their marriage makes a choice. i did They decide to have affairs. I never meant to hurt my first wife, I stuck with it for a long time, but I wish I had sought professional advice on how to deal with my outspoken wife and how to better deal with the challenges of marriage. Despite looking back realizing that I was not ready for such a commitment at that age, I could have made a better effort.

It is NOT your fault that your spouse cheated, but once you find out you were cheated on, it can be very scary. You don’t know who to talk to or where to even start looking for help. You never thought you would have to learn how to deal with infidelity in your marriage. You never thought you would have to read an article about why people have affairs.

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