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Too Pooped for Passion
At one point or another most of us have been too pooped for passion. It is to be expected. BUT this should not be usual. What is the pain point here? A tired spouse and a careless spouse. That’s pretty much what it boils down to.
When you promised to become husband and wife, within those vows was also the commitment to meet certain needs for each other EXCLUSIVELY.
Affection, attention and sexual fulfillment must be filled by your partner. There’s no magic number or time limit on how much love I have to give or how many times you’re telling me I have to. This just depends on your partner. My wife can require a lot of attention. Yours may not. Sex 3 days a week for some may work well for others it may be 5, for others once a month.
Let’s paint a vivid picture: When you became husband and wife you rightfully committed to each other that there are certain needs and wants that I will not allow anyone else to fill except you. Husband – I will not let anyone quench my thirst except you. Woman: I will not allow anyone to drink from my fountain except you.
So what do we do with this, being too much poop for passion? Start by giving your spouse the proper place of value and worth in your heart. When you do this, their needs and wants are placed on your priority list.
This means you RESERVE ENOUGH ENERGY TO TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR SPOUSE. Mates, I understand you don’t talk as much as a woman, so if you need to reserve any of your kind words for your wife when you get home, do so. Don’t spend them all at work. Ladies, you are usually the helper who tries to take care of those in need, filling your responsibility plate to overflow the flow. Now you’re ready to collapse when your head hits the pillow.
We hear you scream -HELP!!! Okay, here we go.
1) Streamline the operations of your day.
Put systems in place to make your day run smoothly. Set boundaries by giving yourself a cut off time for all work. Establish a consistent bedtime for children
2) Know your partner’s needs.
If you don’t know them, it’s time to go treasure hunting. (We’re talking about physical and emotional needs here. We’re not talking about “completing” someone else. That’s not your job.)
3) Keep your vote and meet those needs.
Husband: You would have an absolute fit if your wife allowed another male to pour into her cistern.
Woman: She would leave if her husband allowed another woman to quench his thirst.
4) Change your schedule, renew your day to give each other what you need.
Husband: Prepare the bomb by giving her what she needs emotionally to be excited to receive you, so she’s not doing wifely duty but enjoying her knight in shining armor. What you see as upset may be a cry for your attention and affection. Don’t let her go somewhere else to find it.
Wife: Adjust your schedule to keep yourself rested and refreshed so your husband can partake of the cool waters of your fountain instead of a lukewarm trickle from a stagnant pool.
4) Lay down together.
Neither one sleeps on the sofa and the other continues to clean or work. Start this time TOGETHER. Figure out how each of you wind down for the night: a hot cup of tea, a funny TV show, a foot massage, a shower, a shower together.
5) Abandon all care before entering your room. ALLOW it to be a sanctuary.
Release the weight of the day as it goes down. Be there mentally and physically for your spouse.
Don’t let Too Pooped for Passion become a sore point in your relationship. Renew and update.
Each of these five suggestions is a conversation unto itself. To continue this conversation join the Relationship Revolution.
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